Saturday, February 19, 2011

Changes! Already!

February has been crazy! I found the second week that I'm being laid off, as the music store that I work at is closing. Alex and I had our hysterical moments, worried that this would prevent me from qualifying for maternity benefits during our baby girl's first year. As we have found out, that's not the case at all, and I have the option of going on the benefits earlier than I had anticipated which will really help us out. What a weight off my mind! At the end this coming week, I'm going to be a full-time housewife, stay-at-home Mom in training. Alex and I are so excited about this new chapter in our lives, and I'm especially grateful for this extra time given to me to prepare myself, and our home, and to finish all the projects I have planned to help make our lives easier when she arrives.

Baby girl has a name! Though initially Alex wanted us to keep it secret, somehow the beans were spilled and everyone knows - our baby girl's name is Annabelle, after Annabel Lee, a poem by Edgar Allan Poe. The poem was always close to my heart. I read it for the first time years ago, when Alex and I first started dating. I fell in love with it, and scribbled it on my bedroom window with those window-writer markers. After we found out that we're having a little girl, we wasted no time discussing names. Suddenly, in some stroke of genius, Alex remembered my love for this poem, and while shaving before bed suggested it. It's perfect. Annabelle.

image via weheartit

It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of Annabel Lee;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea;
But we loved with a love that was more than love-
I and my Annabel Lee;
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.

The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me-
Yes!- that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we-
Of many far wiser than we-
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.

For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride,
In the sepulchre there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.

I love it, I love it, and I can't wait to meet her. I'm just about 24 weeks pregnant now, and she's constantly making her presence known to me, always kicking, jumping around and turning.  I'm growing along with her, and while I can still squeeze into pre-pregnancy skinny jeans (with a belly band of course) my tops are getting way too small, way too quickly.

Nesting instinct is starting to take over, and we're collecting all the baby goodies we can get our hands on. Buying and making the things we're actually going to be using is making everything so real to me, and it's a wonderful feeling. 

My Knitpicks order came in:


Need I say more? :D Considering I haven't bought any yarn in the last year, this was well overdue. I feel like I have just scored the perfect knitter's palette for what I'd like to do. It's all Knitpicks Wool of the Andes in worsted weight. It's 100% wool, (not superwash), perfect for soakers, toys and other goodies! Needless to say, I dove in..

I've finished a soaker in the newborn size using the Vanilla pattern for Aran weight yarn in the "Avocado" colorway, going down a needle size, and using worsted weight. It came out quite small, and if it fits her at all, it won't be for long, so I then cast on the next size up. It's perfect! I just need to finish adding the little leg cuffs. 

The sleep sack is almost finished, too! It's certainly taking some stamina to go around.. and around.. and around in plain stockinette, but it'll be well worth it when Annabelle can wear it to bed (or while we're out and about if she doesn't like sleeping in it).

In all the hustle and bustle of the store closing, I managed to score a free desk in the deal! We've set it up against the window in the living room so I can sit here to my heart's content while typing and watch the world go by.. the snow melting.. and when they're planted - the flowers blooming!

I recently picked up Ina May Gaskin's Guide to Childbirth, and Spiritual Midwifery for my Kindle. While I've struggled a little bit with the idea of having a hospital birth, due to our remote location I don't have a choice, really. I have expressed my desire for a natural birth to my doctor and he seems very supportive of it, and I hope these books, along with a couple others will help me gain the confidence I need to give birth in the way that I would like to.

From what I've been recommended, some of the best books out there for our lifestyle and my personal desires for birth and childraising are Ina May Gaskin's books, The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding by La Leche League International and The Attachment Parenting Book by William Sears among others. I've also been recommended The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin as a book for Alex and I to read together.

While I initially wanted my best friend Elyse at the birth, Alex is hell-bent on wanting it to be just us (other than the required medical staff, given that we're in the hospital). I understand where he's coming from, and I'm okay with it, though I made it clear to him that he and I need to familiarize ourselves with the birth process and techniques for pain management, so that he can give me the support that I will undoubtedly need. I'm incredibly grateful to be married to a man so willing to do everything he can to be what I need in a time where I'll no doubt be vulnerable and even a little scared. At first I didn't doubt his ability, but I doubted his willingness to buckle down and learn about how this all works - I feel so blessed, he's willing to read anything I can find that would help us out. I'm going to have my very own lay-man-doula!

I've been reading a lot of Mama blogs lately, keeping caught up with all the cuteness of the babies, the innovative Mommies and all their happenings, and I thought I'd leave you with a list of a few of my favourites, so those out there who are in the same boat as me can check them out.

Sometimes Sweet
Boho Baby Bump
Bonzai Aphrodite
Babyslime on Livejournal
Her Sea of Love

I'll be back posting again soon!

1 comment:

  1. Not a mama blogger, but I am a mama and a granny. Expecting my 6th grandchild in May! This one is a girl, we will have 3 boys, 3 girls. My oldest granddaughter is named Zoe Annabelle, so I love your name! Great blog!


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